unfinished conversations

2009-07-06T03:48:00.002+08:00

it dawned on me that when its all said and done

what really matters is your family, home

2009-04-22T00:52:00.002+08:00

its okay.

sometimes life feels like balancing yourself on a minute plank with marbles under you.

a wrong move and hey you break an elbow, a nose or your spine.I'm totally fine with living like this if not for the ever shrinking bank account.blah.

i'm gonna set study periods for myself thats about it.

2009-02-01T23:18:00.004+08:00

Absolutely Astounding.
i am left flabbergasted at their will to chase down every single ball.
Hats off to nadal even thought every single nerve in me was rooting for federer.
What sadness when he just broke down and sobbed uncontrollably..sigh.
Sports is made special in occasions like this,
Magical when manages to conjour up real emotions in players cool as steel, emotions and nerves harden by the daily regimes of training.
Personally i am swept away while watchin this enthralling match.
Thank you for the inspirations.
I cannot wait for their next meeting.

2009-01-20T00:10:00.000+08:00

in all honesty
twentyfirst is over rated

2009-01-19T23:56:00.000+08:00

I was a quick wet boy, diving too deep for coins
All of your street light eyes wide on my plastic toys
Then when the cops closed the fair, I cut my long baby hair

Stole me a dog-eared map and called for you everywhere
Have I found you
Flightless bird, jealous, weeping or lost you,
american mouth
Big pill looming

Now I'm a fat house cat
Nursing my sore blunt tongue
Watching the warm poison rats curl through the wide fence cracks
Pissing on magazine photos
Those fishing lures thrown in the cold
And clean blood of Christ mountain stream

Have I found you
Flightless bird, grounded, bleeding or lost you,
american mouth
Big pill stuck going down

2008-11-28T06:40:00.001+08:00

watching the sunrise
from sunrise ave
i find myself strangely attatched to the exercise

2008-11-04T23:11:00.000+08:00

Jack's Mannequin-Dark Blue

2008-11-03T00:01:00.001+08:00

i would most definitely recommend everyone to watch it

its a more surprising package than it looks

2008-08-20T16:53:00.007+08:00

i'm absolutely enthralled by the Olympic Games

To see records drops like flies

To witness when atheletes challenge the very limit of what the human can achieve

I love it when the atheletes create history

The greatest form of immortality is attained----think mark spitz,carl lewis

until of course someone takes over as the new god.

I wonder how it feels like to be a step ahead of humanity

To swim faster,stronger,more consistantly,

Last longer,

Run faster,

Jump Higher,

Be Stronger

Execute jumps,turns twist more perfectly,

that anyother human on the planet

Michael Phelps

Usain Bolt

Elena Isinbaeva

Guo Jing Jing

Matthias Steiner

This guys are gods in their own rights.

Absolutely inspiring

Now...if only i can find enough strength to get out of my couch.ha

2008-08-08T01:08:00.003+08:00

baked bean thief

2008-08-05T23:25:00.003+08:00

Honestly,my world could be more awesome

But hey,"i love whole world,It's such a brillant place"!!

Boom-dee yah deh,Boom-dee yah deh,Boom-dee yah deh,

Kinda reminds me how i'm gonna miss the event back at Cat High next sat.sigh

2008-07-16T23:25:00.002+08:00

It was one hundred degrees, as we sat beneath a willow tree,
Who's tears didn't care, they just hung in the air, and refused to fall, to fall.

it's times like this
you ever imagine a world that hate the his smiles
the slow clockwork of the world seems to set everything against him
a reaction to his every action
he cant control the sound and crackle of his voice
the shape his facial expression choose to take
he seem weak
but his only flaw?he tries too hard.thinks too much
but fret not
go to sleep and see the gentle breeze set plains alive

remember to forget
what would happen if this was gotham?

truth to be told i could use a few inspiring articles

2008-07-11T13:59:00.002+08:00

I Will Possess Your Heart-Deathcab for Cutie

How I wish you could see the potential,
the potential of you and me
It's like a book elegantly bound,
but in a language that you can't read just yet
You gotta spend some time love,
you gotta spend some time with me
And I know that you'll find love,
I will possess your heart
You gotta spend some time love,
you gotta spend some time with me
And I know that you'll find love,
I will possess your heart

There are days when outside your window,
I see my reflection as I slowly pass
And I long for this mirrored perspective,
when we'll be lovers, lovers at last
You gotta spend some time love,
you gotta spend some time with me
And I know that you'll find love,
I will possess your heart
You gotta spend some time love,
you gotta spend some time with me
And I know that you'll find love,
I will possess your heart

I will possess your heart
I will possess your heart

You reject my advances and desperate pleas I won't let you,
let me down so easily, so easily

You gotta spend some time love,
you gotta spend some time with me
And I know that you'll find love,
I will possess your heart
You gotta spend some time love,
you gotta spend some time with me
And I know that you'll find love,
I will possess your heart
You gotta spend some time love,
you gotta spend some time with me
And I know that you'll find love,
I will possess your heart

I will possess your heart
I will possess your heart
I will possess your heart--

ho alright,they're back

2008-06-30T01:17:00.002+08:00

jolie is sizzling as fox
wanted is pretty much worth catchin but i think the source material's the real deal

why does deathcab have to hit town on the 12th
screw the schedule

waiting for the 3rd
screw the schedule again

7and a 1/2 months

and yes
i'll possess your heart

2008-06-18T21:27:00.002+08:00

stuck with so many thoughts processing inside all at once
so many things happening all at once
so many uncertainties
and sometimes among all this
somewhere somehow you read something really nice
not necessary for you per se
and instead you take a deep breath
letting it out almost like a sigh...almost
...gladness steming from realising there are beautiful things still arnd

2008-06-17T23:41:00.002+08:00

generally how am i feeling right now?

i want a yatch where i wold just sit and sail for hours/days/months

just bobbing going nowhere

there just this sense of irrepressible frustration

grrrrrr

grinds teeth

i am franky disgusted at how things work

and the "software" disgust me the most

*spits*

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

otherwise find me this feeling

the thrill of getting "IT"

this guy is just IMPOSSIBLE

while doing the recee tday i just finally realised our playgrnd isnt all that big after all

and the lil white card with a prancing bull brings back so much memories

i liked the days when you can dreams..with all the innocence in the world

and you have the courage to dream even when you'r fully aware of the reality surrounding you

get me out

quick

2008-06-10T00:48:00.002+08:00

is it me or is this year's euro just that bit more boring?
copare that with the uber-world cup fever i suffered two years back
this years' summer footie fest really..kinda suck

and couple that with starhub's increasingly ingenius ways to rip footie fans off
it's really starting to annoy me
what for an extra fee you cld actually get to watch a bunch a football match with half the excitement of an epl match with a barely alive commentator talking u thru thr match..oh man...
and i tot the copa america commentator was bad...
but at least THAT poor guy tried.....with his "GOALLLLLLL GOALLL GOALL GOOOOALLLLL"
the euro commentator is horrendous to say the least...and yes dont forget the package comes with excellent half time report of half fuck replays of "highlights"...come one give me a break already
u mean with all the extra stuff we pay a decent half time analysis CANT be provided????
and not to forget yes u get fantastic replays of the same adverts every SINGLE break

but you know wats really the most disappointing of all?
the teams really seems less than inspired
they all look like they rather be on some sunny island flaunting their cash
sigh
i'm crossing my fingers on the hol-ita match later
cause all the matches so far
hmmmmm cant seem to even keep me awake

and erm yeah...
nobody's arnd is really kinda interested this year
sigh
anyone wanna be khaki?

bring my manu back pls
the wait for aug is way too long

let me change tt
the wait for JULY is way too long

2008-06-07T09:59:00.002+08:00

its weird what u can do when ur a lil high
the stuff i been writting been a lil "cringe-worthy" for quite a while
till probably life gave me a reality check and dump a load on me

ok
so its kinda like my block leave
but it just so happens that wow everyone's leavin

and talk bout work man
even when i volunteered to come back on wed i'm gonna have it pretty packed

i guess for most of the week its gonna be bout me,myself and ermmmm...oh yes "I"....
time to hit the tarmac

2008-05-25T22:32:00.004+08:00

THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH
i was surprised!and touched..and happy
a lil regret i was to traumatise to think!shld have totally taken a picture
not in the bathroom of course
you guys/gals automatically qualifies for the greatest buddies award
and also the greatest pervs
AND of course there's the special one
love loads
you get the BESTEST BEST girlfriend award
thou eh ur idea was just morally wrong
hope the trip up the air was good!

three birthday wishes for the year

get in to a half decent local u course..or she will dump me
MANU to get another double!treble!or even quadruple!!
let me be really happy......

i feel half emo-old

i hope the next 365 day will be mighty fine
and pls let it come a lil slower
sigh

now wont the world stop spinning for me?

2008-05-24T16:22:00.000+08:00

2008-05-23T20:52:00.001+08:00

if murphy decides to shit on ur head you'll feel exactly like me

and no ones making ANYTHING easier

air?

2008-05-23T00:28:00.002+08:00

scenes of uncontrolled,overpowering joy

quoting van der saar-'You have two, three or four seconds on your own, arms in the air and everything goes through your mind. You see your team-mates coming and it's just happiness."

fergie on scholes-"I'm delighted for the boy. He is a fantastic person. People like Scholes, Giggs and Neville: they know what Man United means. They deserve that. "

tevez-"It has been a long time since I felt like this - it's a huge emotion in my heart."

.fergie.tevez.scholes.roon.ron.ferdinand.vidic.carrick.giggs

man they were prob the only thing that made me smile on this hectic terrible day

photos when i'm home

why didn't park feature?

2008-05-18T11:27:00.002+08:00

Stolen-Dashboard Confessional

We watch the season pull up its own stakes
And catch the last weekend of the last week
Before the gold and the glimmer have been replaced,
Another sun soaked season fades away

You have stolen my heart

Invitation only, grant farewells
Crush the best one, of the best ones
Clear liquor and cloudy eyed,
too early to say goodnight

You have stolen my heart

And from the ballroom floor
we are in celebration
One good stretch before our hibernation
Our dreams assured and we all,
will sleep well

You have stolen
You have stolen my heart
I watch you spin around in the highest heels

You are the best one,
of the best ones

We all look like we feel
You have stolen my
You have stolen my heart

2008-04-30T22:00:00.001+08:00

i love the ginger haired assasin

"so erm...is good day "hi"? or "bye"?"
ha

2008-04-24T22:22:00.002+08:00

my situation leaves me as such that i - ;
-get increasing lousy at even semi-formal writtings
-lose my maturity by the day
-starts letting days slip pass my fingers in an increasingly casual manner

neg

AND WHY the heck did he miss that penalty..damm

2008-04-14T23:18:00.003+08:00

i watched yet ANOTHER natalie portman film and a movie(in the other boyeln girl)
Closer is really....just kinda makes you think a lil bit more
makes you doubt growin up is any good..ect
i hope my life won't end up anywhere near there
Seriously

she's very pretty in the movie
intense
guilty
but beautiful
just tt little bit of regret in watching her do the movie
"lying is the most fun a girl can get without taking off her clothes"
and i thought that was just a song title
a lil lighter pls
i like the garden state
i realised i more or less almost always like the movie she does
just like brad pitt's
biasesness on my part

i found a pretty cool new singer in marie digby

been missing a dumbo for a while now

2008-04-14T01:28:00.002+08:00

GLORY GLORY MAN UNITED
thank goodness for the win
owen hargreaves's free kick was sublime
left the whole team looking at ron with the "weren't YOU supposed to take it" look
ha and take that "cheater from togo"
Park had a good game
Tevez had a good game
Van der Sar is like the understated hreo of the day
and yeshhh ron and roon
AND THE RED GO MARCHING IT!!

2008-04-13T23:53:00.002+08:00

the game is making me pace/hop around in front of the tv more than usual
dont think i'll be able to sleep after this
!
oh man oh manuuuu

2008-04-12T01:24:00.001+08:00

Before ellen page and juno
there was natalie portman and samantha...
Man.i'm so head over heels over her

shit..my head is so gonna be on the chopping board when someone sees this
happy MUGGING!

2008-04-12T01:23:00.001+08:00

didn't exactly grow wings
bleah
nope..no horns either
---20th march

2008-04-07T23:49:00.003+08:00

well its time i pretty much dusted the blog
kinda like an understatement to mention that alot has since passed
comms parade
coms ball
new unit
which all kinda really flashed passed right in an instant
i still didnt really know what had hit me

can't stop watching movies recently(dvd or otherwise)
definately,maybe is kinda sweetly-disturbing
and i somehow caught a new addiction to renting dvds
new addiction to renting dvds of OLD movies
lets see---full metal jacket,blade runner,top gun,forrest gump,ET
oh..and napoleon dynamite was really disappointing
thought it was like a old school juno--turned out NOTHING i watched this year got anywhere near it
oh well

oh yes..i just HAVE to mention the course i kinda got haphazardly slotted into
having it with nsmen..makes it a hell lots more interesting
new stories EVERYday
studying with a class of overgrown boys who happen to have high flying careers and are really full-time "rich-quirky" husbands/fathers in disguise
makes me feel kinda young again
while for my buddy..erm it kinda triggered off his paternal instincts prematurely ha

on a last note
i dont bike..so no worries!=)
actually its more like cant
i hope 1st may comes soon!
hopefully someone will by then decide to stop torturing me

2008-03-13T23:50:00.001+08:00

well i lay awake on this last night in ocs
the very last time
9mths
i hate goodbyes

2008-03-12T22:57:00.001+08:00

step up is one body popping inducing movie
the pretty female lead is a plus...

"Shawty had them apple bottom jeans (jeans)
Boots with the fur (with the fur)
The whole club was lookin at her
She hit the flo (she hit the flo)
Next thing u kno
Shawty got low low low low low low low low
Them baggy sweat pants
And the reeboxs with the straps (with the straps)
She turned around and gave that big booty a slap (heeey)
She hit the flo (she hit the flo)
Next thing u kno
Shawty got low low low low low low low low"

2008-03-03T21:13:00.001+08:00

i guess somewhere down the line
a lil less than two weeks from now
i'll miss being a cadet
how i wish someone can see that....

2008-03-02T23:05:00.002+08:00

can't sleep-
all i want is that special friend
zip-

monkey
back
trend

Life is a rough biography. Memories smooth out the edges. ~Dante G. Roque

someone wrote it somewher

2008-02-25T01:03:00.002+08:00

feels good to be watching so much football all over again
OMGZHZHZH WOODGATE SCORESSSSSS
just as i'm typing this
wad a crappy goal but man i feel happy for tottenham
they have been playing so well the whole match only to fall behind to a drogba wonder free kick
been a long time since i watch much football and i glad i'm getting time for it again at the time of the season where titles are decided.
and well i must say that the rooney,tevez,ronaldo,anderson,nani,hargreves,carrick gang hasn't been the least bit disappointing at all ok well cept for the manchester derby game
but hey 10 goals in a week is good enough i guess
and well the titles gonna be in the old trafford trophy case at the end of the season for sure
and erm the pics of the horrendous tackle was way way way way disturbing esp the ones they showed on football channel
fuck man..its like the alan smith incident all over again cept that smudge's broken leg aint that "urghh" to view

i hate goodbyes
dosent help tt i have an exceptionally good memories for all the kinda irrelavant stuff in life
i hate goodbyes

personal promise
i'll get the thing done

2008-02-17T23:09:00.001+08:00

This town is colder now, I think it's sick of us
It's time to make our move, I'm shakin off the rust
I've got my heart set on anywhere but here
I'm staring down myself, counting up the years

Steady hands, just take the wheel...
And every glance is killing me
Time to make one last appeal...
for the life I lead

Stop and stare
I think I'm moving but I go nowhere
Yeah I know that everyone gets scared
But I've become what I can't be,
oh
Stop and stare
You start to wonder why you're 'here' not there
And you'd give anything to get what's fair
But fair ain't what you really need
Oh, can u see what I see

They're tryin to come back, all my senses push
Un-tie the weight bags, I never thought I could...
Steady feet, don't fail me now
Gonna run till you can't walk
But something pulls my focus out
And I'm standing down...
Stop and stare
I think I'm moving but I go nowhere
Yeah I know that everyone gets scared
But I've become what I can't be, oh

Stop and stare
You start to wonder why you're here not there
And you'd give anything to get what's fair
But fair ain't what you really need
Oh, you don't need
What u need, what u need...
Stop and stare
I think I'm moving but I go nowhere
Yeah I know that everyone gets scared
But I've become what I can't be
Oh, do u see what I see...

when u start to feel all alone again
if i'm doing right

2008-02-13T19:25:00.002+08:00

alright!
Grand slam...traded my limbs upteen times/went on a satrving streak/run like a mad tart just to get em

go catch juno!
i'm absolutely in love with her
freakishly quirky sarcistically funny
ha
i have my eyes on the soundtrack

Anyone else but you
You're a part time lover and a full time friend
The monkey on you're back is the latest trend
I don't see what anyone can see,
in anyone else
But you

Here is the church and here is the steeple
We sure are cute for two ugly people
I don't see what anyone can see,
in anyone else
But you

We both have shiny happy fits of rage I want more fans,
you want more stage
I don't see what anyone can see,
in anyone else
But you
You are always trying to keep it real

I'm in love with how you feel
I don't see what anyone can see,
in anyone else
But you

I kiss you on the brain in the shadow of a train
I kiss you all starry eyed,
my body's swinging from side to side
I don't see what anyone can see, in anyone else
But you

The pebbles forgive me, the trees
forgive me
So why can't, you forgive me?
I don't see what anyone can see,
in anyone else
But you

Du du du du du du dudu Du du du du du du dudu
I don't see what anyone can see, in anyone

2008-01-29T09:44:00.001+08:00

feeling float-y this three days

2008-01-29T09:26:00.000+08:00

oh well oh well
back from thaiiiiilandddd-in their really interesting accent
twentyyyy-fvyyy twentyy--fvyyy
sai yok canteen and stuff
crescendo was a good trip i guess
cept for the fact tt i had to come down with this weird allergy
---pudge-do-monia---if i have to name it
3jabs+being put on drip+3days later = good as new
missing finale sucked big time thou
and yeah
two more mths
kinda bitter-sweet
more sweet actuallty haaha

miss the peeps + one back in sg a hell lot too
feels good to be back
cant wait to meet everyone
but i guess it'll take a week

pray hard for the tactics test and atp
200,200,pls
pls pls pls

still an awkward boy i guess

think i should have just gotten the gramaphone
this is like the 18th disc i rented already
well new hobby i guess

ha stuck in ntu free access lab
clearing my mail(which by the way is surprising quite cleared up already)
and i wonder why..
opps...
hahah
man logic and reason is kinda flung outta the window here
waking up at 6 and travelling to the place i'm bookin in tomorrrow???
oooooohhhh
tennn--thirty..tenn-thirtyyyy...hurryyyy upppp

oh well oh well
seems to me its gonna be tough to start my engine all over

2008-01-01T19:15:00.000+08:00

languid-how apt

jimmy eats world

i miss this day last year
and the day before
and the day before that

you were probably the only good thing that happended to me in the year
penguins and lames jokes

well u know the image of angel in marvel 1806?

how am i supposed to break the news?
is there anything to look ahead to?
school?

i need to leave this place for a while
can wait for april+365
off to somewhere i hope

what will it be like 10 years from now?
30?when kids will be our age
T-W-E-N-T-Y

first i have to shake off that stupid habit of being late
new year resolution please

2007-12-25T23:16:00.001+08:00

well this year's xmas seems alott more muted than the rest
havin to book in made it(trust me) a hell lot worse
man i miss last year and the year before AND the year before tt
and man most of all i miss someone
so many things i want to squeeze into this post
but well gotta reserve them for another time
being in camp is so.....depressing

2007-12-16T23:09:00.000+08:00

4 words

GLORY GLORY MAN UNITED

i think we made it a habit to play lousy and still drop a sucker punch against the reds
makes them jump a lil more
haha..

alrighttt

2007-12-11T19:37:00.000+08:00

well sometimes some stuff teach you bout life

everyone has their story.. whats yours?

jcc was less inspiring than i thought and yet in someways in taught me lessons that i could never have imagined i could get outta this
jcc was less a big deal that i first thought and seriously the fear of going through it was a hell lot worse that the actual thing itself
and at the same time it brings out the weirdest/best/worse/most resilient side in you.
imagine me calling my three packs of ziplocks ,which are the only stuff dry on me, happy paks 1.2.3
and at the end of the day when the dust's all settled..u start to realise that things isnt much of a deal
its just another piece of cloth

seem like the piece of paper i so fiercely protected in that 9 days doesnt really matter

first it was bout time.den it wasnt.guess its about choices

life's kinda like my bunk right now.kinda in a mess

there's support u ought to be getting and there's support u get

well "i'm damm slim" isnt sucha bad comic line wad
and yeah thanks ah pangseh on the emo trip over a pair of earphones
and yeah everyone should have a conscience
i now know why they call it retail therapy

things strikes ppl
randomly
something just did me

2007-11-22T22:28:00.000+08:00

man wasnt this the fastest day ever in my life
poof

sometimes you just gotta ask yourself why ur doing this

not exactly feeling hella optimistic at the moment

and sometimes a surprise pops up unexpectedly..=)
thank you

2007-11-14T15:59:00.000+08:00

erm...kinda realised that my blog's kinda stuck in a really agnsty period
but well...things like this makes u ignore larly anything else in life
like i kinda didnt update bout the whole jc thing which is well over
still waiting for the ******* thou...kinda seem to be lost in transition
jpc's kinda over
which just really basically means that JCC is bloody staring at me straight at me
i'm hoping i can kinda live thru it
getting the badge's a must
AND its really funny when one of the "tips" given is..guess what..not to cry during the course
kinda makes u shivers just thinking bout it
haha
imagine the kinda stuff that cld make grown 19 year old boys cry
man...i realise tt's kinda not funny
i really hope i wont get to tt pt in brunei

i'm just gonna take inspiration frm mr-soon-to-be-commisioned-commando..ho
totally secertly jealous tt they are gonna get commisoned in a mth's time
and i'm still stuck here
with lancer AND crecendo(why why why thailand!?) to clear

and oh i'm having a 6 day off in lieu
the only problem?
erm..kinda everyone's either in camp or busy with exams
dammmmm
what a bummer.....

love the song..thou its a lil over played in the bunks right now
AND its diff to hmm without ever sounding like a weirdo

Alicia Keys-N0 One

I just want you close
Where you can stay forever
You can be sure
That it will only get better
You and me together
Through the days and nights
I don’t worry ‘coz
Everythings gonna be alright
People keep talking
They can say what they like
But all I know is everything’s gonna be alright
No one no one no one
Can get in the way of what I’m feeling
No one no one no one
Can get in the way of what I feel for you
You you
Can get in the way of what I feel for you
When the rain is pouring down
And my heart is hurting
You will always be around
This I know for certain
You and me together
Through the days and nights
I don’t worry cause
Everythings gonna be alright
People keep talking
They can say what they like
But all I know is everything’s gonna be alright

2007-11-02T10:41:00.001+08:00

fuck

2007-11-02T10:34:00.000+08:00

cause everyone needs someone to hold

2007-10-25T22:50:00.001+08:00

and all i wanted was to talk
fuck man
the stupid stings hurts like hell

2007-10-07T20:19:00.000+08:00

this is probably a tad too stale
but i really miss those mundane days where u had nothing to do
and had plenty of time to just look at the rain fall
spent time with ppl you want to spend time with
and did not bother with wats coming next
i miss you

2007-09-30T15:06:00.000+08:00

hmmmm
sometimes i wonder why am i so emo so much of the time
i want to just stay at home,hide,escape and act like the time's at a standstill too
too bad for me in army terms they call tt awol
i want to stop chasing after time stop having datelines piled up my head
i need to start smiling-smiling
i just keep chasing
keep running
running
runnin
21 weeks...den would it be better?
a year and 10months
would it be better?
i hate being the pile of sludge tt slows you down
i dont know how to feel anymore
i want to slow down to collect my thoughts
stop hyper threading so much its all a mangled pile of stuff in my head
and the effects really shows
i dont want to have to share stuff with anyone else but

i dont know if u want to

like i have a choice...
or options..there was a time when i really really loathe havin choice/options
vacaaation
europe...seeeeeem so farr ayway

u

life's better when u start breaking them down
but u cant deny it when it hurts

2007-09-12T11:21:00.000+08:00

i'm glad that there'r bands like coldplay around
--

2007-09-07T19:12:00.000+08:00

when was the last time you smiled from your heart
instead of using it as a shield
so you could hide yourself from every damm thing in the world

crap

2007-09-06T12:17:00.000+08:00

dont you vaguely remember the moments where you wished you couldnt run away from your life?
like from where you feet , choices , actions and destiny leads you to
to spin wildly off track
and just about lose all the shackles clamped on you?
the people around you seem kind closely distant or distantly close
however you want to put it
just drop me into somewhere farrrrr away
to live a life with no agenda
and you know you can live with being alone
without having to look over your shoulders EVERY SINGLE BLOODY moment
seriously i need to get some stuff/people/things/options outta my life

2007-08-27T18:06:00.000+08:00

P-R-I-D-E

weird perplexing complex set of 5 alphabets

.....i cant find the words..sigh

2007-08-20T19:52:00.000+08:00

em how do i put it
the past few months have been kinda fuzzy/busy/meandering/insecure all at the same time
time have sudden turned kinda twisted and wrap
life's been bittersweet to say the least
more bitter than sweet actually
9 weeks in ocs have been so fast so furious
sometimes i just wished i could stop and breath
and stop
and wait
walk and be quiet
sit on a ledge and just talk
and basically spend time....
but well i choose my own path anyway
just like what plain white tee's sang
"The world will never ever be the same
And you're to blame "

totally hooked on to that song

2007-08-15T18:34:00.000+08:00

have you ever felt like you were never good enough?

2007-08-12T03:00:00.000+08:00

amidst all the whirlwind changes
tiring regiments
and random helter skelter in life
sometimes all you need is one
and i am so lucky

2007-06-23T04:04:00.000+08:00

life its weird
things change
but hold on
its like ur being inverted or something
i'm a lil messed up
i hate the emo piece of shit
its hard to live by your brain...u feel kinda sucked in and u just have to keep a real straight face
i need some where to deposit all this
few mths...before its too late

i dont know if i'm gd enough to stay in there

So live like you mean it,
Love till you feel it,
Its all that we need in our lives,
So stand on the edge with me,
Hold back your fear and see,
Nothing is real till its gone.
Hold on before its to late,
We'll run till we leave this behind,
Don't fall just be who you are,
Its all that we need in our lives.
And hold on before its too late,
We'll run till we leave this behind,
Don't fall just be who you are,
It's all that we need in our lives,
It's all that we need in our lives,
It's all that i need in my life.
-Before Its Too Late
Goo Goo Dolls

2007-06-13T18:55:00.000+08:00

the birds will sing, the sun will shine, for us you and me ahhhhh....
we are from 1st plt, apache company ahhhh....

emm three days tons of stuff and the overall feeling of a lil emo-ness/sadness

too much too fast too lil time

i knew pop wld never really be like a happy-happy day
its weird but really nice to see grown boys expressing how they feel
go hit with the 2nd which i really didnt think i deserved..makes it a lil weird but aiya u get 3secs of recognition who gives a fuck
the reason behind the homat thing was really a screwed one...i am angry...but mostly at myself
and i bet you never knew...and like phang wrote human nature IS what makes us vulnerable
i guess its back to really hating book ins...

they say army turns boys into men..em like hello i think it turns men into boys abeit boys with a real sense of responsibility

and i guess it cool how 2 mths cld pawn the shit out of 2 years

2007-06-10T10:26:00.000+08:00

ever seen the tekong sunset?
seen it once on the fast craft fuckin nice...thou it kinda brings back memory of the seemingly pointless stand to
poping in 3 days time...damm weird la
hair for friends's a really good deal
and we are really gd biaaaatches
being bed 1 is fun...cause u always get shit tt u rmb for life ur kinda like the recon team
getting the 2144234324 "chee-byes" flung at me on ifc...getting pump for the gac...having to wait 8 hrs after my grenade throw
i'm a sucker for noslagia so yeah i will miss the ppl much
but life's like that i guess

i like how some ppl reason their way thru life
damm funny

and i appreciate how some spend time looking for red tins
so pls dont be pissed

2007-06-03T16:53:00.000+08:00

like coldplay sang "confusion NEVER stops"

the thing about being confused is that u can never really spells out what confuses you?
its like c-o-n-f-s-u..opps
c-o-n-u-f-s..oppss
actually confused would be a wrong word
"unsure"...definately maybe
kinda bout a lil more than a week to pop but it feels a lil funny
so much went past the two mths plus(MY birthday included) it feels a lil rush
and the only unberable part was the first two weeks
the random guys i was dumped around with are a great bunch
and i had a blast c-l-a-p-s-ing and stuff
it was really weird/nice having to do route march on tt day and even weirder/nicer to have the whole platoon sing me a birthday song on the 16click
ha unforgettable to say the least(and no i'm gushing like a lil girl just in case someone says i'm unappriciative AGAIN)
the only thing was that there wasnt much time to "think"
much better than days when i was wearing grey and blue at least
random ppl i was around with....em definately more than enjoyable
sometimes this gut wrenching effect kinda takes over..head slapping included and you dont really know what to do
ha cant say i like how life like to lead you to some weird multi split junction again AND again
sometimes just for the fun of it
emmm did the soup some-round wanted ytd and i hoped no one had any problems today
and sometimes i wonder how come i sleep so much after enlistment

till pop
till pop
till then every spartans from tt one platoon from tt one company

of course i bet someone saw tt coming

"in the confusion and aftermath......."
told u i was confused...now the one reading would be too

2007-05-21T00:50:00.000+08:00

"Signal Fire"

The perfect words never crossed my mind,
Cuz there was nothin' in there but you.
I felt every ounce of me screaming out,
But the sound was trapped deep in me.
All I wanted just sped right past me,
While I was rooted fast to the earth,
I could be stuck here for a thousand years,
Without your arms to drag me out.

[Chorus:]
There you are standing right in front of me
There you are standing right in front of me
All this fear falls away to leave me naked,
Hold me close, cuz I need you to guide me to safety.

No, I don't want to wait forever [x2]

In the confusion and the aftermath,
You are my signal fire.
The only resolution and the only joy,
Is the faint spark of forgiveness in your eyes.

[Chorus (x2)]

No, I don't want to wait forever [x3]

2007-05-12T12:34:00.000+08:00

First thing first....
GLORY GLORY MAN UNITED
GLORY GLORY MAN UNITED
GLORY GLORY MAN UNITED
AND THE REDS GO MARCHING ON ON ON

WOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
i was such an anxious boy during field camp man not for anything else
but the thorn up feeling of not knowing the scorelines of the matches(thou there were like lil nuggets of info fed from the sgts but even then it cld be like some bullshit talk)
i'm kinda irked tt i didnt get to watch like any of the matches..won't be getting any on the last week of epl either)
TSK
now have to wait till august

now for army
emmm field camp was a lil bitch emm not exactly tough but there was alot of waiting
wah lau...new nick of the year
half the ppl in the platoon know me as section 1 bed 1 more than anything else
k more updates later

2007-04-27T22:49:00.000+08:00

hmmm so i'm back abeit for a short while only
army was ok at the max
lotsa pent up frustrations
cant put it up my blog if i ever want to get anywhere
but at least i found a short term purpose and goal
just tt the passion is a lil lacking
and more importantly i learnt how to survive w/o the computer
omg applause for me pls
lil tired will update later

2007-04-12T01:11:00.000+08:00

hmmmm at least i met everyone cept for one bugger before i went in
even dara
ha tt was the surprise if the week
the "big bro" i nvr had
he unknowingly always sorta get my thinking a lil straighter everytime i met him

tooo bad i'm a lil tired to post all the last dinner/supper/lunch photos
and yeah i'mm miss the free air and everyone

2007-04-11T17:32:00.000+08:00

emm damm its sucha wrong show to watch right before army
no ending summore
wtf
and i watched the final disc 3 times
i cant believe tt myself

dammmm emo fuck lah
no hair either

i am dammmmm tired but i dont want to sleep
not even nap
i dont want to waste freedom without reason

the only moments i felt ok in the whoole week
was the 2 hrs during the manu-roma game and 1 hr after tt which i spent "high-ing"
last manu match i am able to watch before gg in
thank u for the 7 goals

2007-04-10T01:09:00.000+08:00

despite all the emo-ness running around
i had a gd time in timbre
happy birthday andy

frm timbre
to the park with the stalker cat
the tcc om talk
and msn emo
thanks

i think i'll just grab a line frm famous last words
thou its severly misquoted

2007-04-07T03:17:00.000+08:00

i guess army wont br bad after all
the simple life lah
just pray u dont get the toilet post
plspls

jumped arnd and read bout posts of wayyyyyyyy past on other blogs
sorta a pity why i didnt keep my writings when i was back wearing green shorts
maybe if i had kept the blog
it probably wont be all filled mostly with nasty/sad stuff

so much for that
where were you while we we having fun

still remembered the two weeks "epidemic" break in sec 3
tot i was gonna save my ass from the stripping thing and lock out
haha
in the end we all still "tio" big time
and funny lil scuffles i'll remember
life in cat high is the only thing keeping me optimistic bout army
after all its the same 5days with nothing but balls for company isnt it

some ppl can totally crack me up lah

too bad the posts will soon be far and few between

aiya i totally shld have been more proactive in designing my room
at least then can blame ppl for not executin them
i want a sunroof....or a balcony

2007-04-06T01:37:00.000+08:00

aiya nights always bring on the emo times
boredom almost always brings along the a'loneliness
hmm first night i've been so free in a while
no company for mj,stayovers,matches or drinks

"think" "think"

playing my wholeeeee collection of coldplay music juz to bring the emo to the nxt lvl
clocks..confusion nvr stops
fix you---fix meeeeeee
warning SignS!
hardest part
THE scientist--->
yelloWWWWW
T-R-O-U-B-L-E
ladder to the sun

freakily missing something
when ur feeling weird all the songs seems to be talking to/bout you

the problem is i've got no idea what i'm emoing over...cld be the army

yeah so i'm enlisting nxt thurs(and i tot it was on wed!)
and truthfully speaking i dont really give a damm bout what they do to u inside
i think i'm more than capable of handling it w/o getting into shit loads of trouble
and i'm more than ready to leave my hair behind(dont know y but i'm REALLY READY to shave)
maybe i dont like to leave my freedom behind
maybe i'm afraid of the nighmare of aj recurring
maybe i'm afraid of being left behind
maybe
maybes

go watch freedom writers
really good
plus...in certain ways it sorta struck a chord with me

i just wished ppl wont be all so cynical--and tried to give themselves the excuse tt they are just being pragmatic
and they would try to make a difference no matter how BIG or small
i admire ppl like bono and the gates,even al gore who is doing his lil battle raising awareness for global warming
ppl behind ONE maketradefair and the thousand of other ppl that are doing their part for a genuine cause
ppl that tries to make things difference no matter to millions to to just one..maybe THAT one
i have never tried hard enough..nvr..and only i know it
i just wished tt maybe i cld be someone tt cld make a difference

kinda make me think bout my blog too
stuff here just seemed so insignificant compared to all the shit ppl out there are getting
and dont we all blog to chronicle our lives and thoughts?
or maybe just to make ourself feel just that lil more important tt someone if anyone cared
sometimes i wished i would write a journal instaed of a blog
and someone i truly trusted/even respected wld read it
or maybe i just need to talk like coldplay sang

but then i wont get to see how we all grew up and moved on like how i managed to kinda revisit peeps lives mine included
and see how we all ctnd with life...not necessary in the right direction

nobody said it was easy

am i part of this disease?

dont get me wrong i'm not sad
it takes hellllll lots to bring me down
i'm just like they said..being kuai lan

like how i'll feel embarassed/tickled/confused/pissed when i look back at the many prev posts
i'm sure i'll feel something for this post when i move on a lil too

2007-04-01T19:15:00.000+08:00

too much time with to lil to do is not funny
for the past 24 or more i had practically nothing to do
but to look at the sky frm the ledge at my grandma's
maybe look at the chickens nxt door
sends ur brains into overdrive
i'm pretty glad it didnt have me end up singing the chorus of THAT song frm grey's anatomy

hoho
me and my head

maybe its the inate prankster in me playing a joke on myself haha

naiveness and being cynical
are they like on the opposite ends of the spectrum?

i totally second phang on tt statement made on the 30th of march

and sorry hor...lions dont eat grass...not even on april fool's

2007-03-31T06:31:00.000+08:00

i guess the weirdest stuff happens during the period when u are stuck beween sleep and being awake

the sandman's favourite visiting hour

my brains a lil like my stomach right now..churning

2007-03-26T22:30:00.000+08:00

em this is actually many posts lumped tgt
not been able to really put tgt a real entry the past week
just random nuggets of thoughts in the saved in the drafts

em ok
i kinda feel more at peace with myself now
sorta happened SUDDENDLY today either while going home or before i slept
sorta understood myself and yeah who i am a lil more
i guess the smile's all me(dont reckon i'll be a good agnsty personality type)
and so's the i wanna change the world some day
although i'll really like to get filthy rich part
coupled with the "i'm really afraid of failure now tt i got shitty grades" portion
and of course the "should i just leave it again" bit
i'm really glad cause i dont know but some how
these are all the thoughts i gathered while i was thinking thru ANOTHER lil problem
emm but still there still a lil LARGE portion of the jigsaw to be found

hair ruffling thoughts/or even without the hair
ruffle-ruffle-ruffle

i kinda realise i miss my job
not the actually having a job
but THE job

so life among the unemployed have been real good
thou we ARE rushing for time a lil here..
barely more than 2 weeks left
everyday's p-a-c-k-e-d
drinks,mj,tennis,mumbooojumboo,mj,tennis,pandamonium--for last week
mj,mj,tennis,mumbooojumboo,mj,tennis,pandamonium too--for this
see we're shaping up for a regimental lifestyle quite nicely
but i'm a lil outta shape,hur hur

i'm missin out on a lil reading,
emmm the funnny show on loan couresy of a certain weri--ohh i meant maro
and my night safari cum museum cum offshore island and sungei buloh trip

MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE
I DON'T LOVE YOU

Well when you go
Don't ever think I'll make you try to stay
And maybe when you get back
I'll be off to find another way

When after all this time that you still owe
You're still the good-for-nothing
I don't know
So take your gloves and get out
Better get out
While you can

When you go
Would you even turn to say
"I don't love you like I did yesterday"?

Sometimes I cry so hard from pleading
So sick and tired of all the needless beating
But baby when they knock you down and out
It's where you oughta stay

And after all the blood that you still owe
Another dollar's just another blow
So fix your eyes and get up
Better get up

While you can
When you go
Would you even turn to say
"I don't love you like I did yesterday"?

Well come one, come on

When you go
Would you have the guts to say
"I don't love you like I loved you yesterday"?
I don't love you like I do yesterday

I don't love you like I loved you yesterday

i just happen to really like this song
good thinking song
nothing else--dont try to read too much to the lyrics and into my life nope
this song and window in the skies
check out the music vid for that song
TOTAL rockass vid

damm weird

this is a lil disturbing
to think all the new shows i'll be watching
like the utt-linda liao show
i wont be completing them

ha and damm funny ah
my flobble's SUDDENDLY hit with a msges
with peeps not me pretending to be me saying they are not me
hey i like the sound of that
and it actually makes sense

ruffle ruffle ruffled..

2007-03-14T01:48:00.000+08:00

feeling pretty darn gd this week..so far anyway
wrk's been nice

death is coming to the silver screen
death:the high cost of living better be one hella movie
gaiman is directing this himself
and wow stardust is already filmed and done
big names heading the film too
i can almost feel the anticipation overflowing from my every pore

2007-03-13T01:23:00.000+08:00

hey u should go shoot urself
got choice to make make noise
no choice to make also make noise
life's a bitch
nobody's child
i've got many 18s to go man
its sad shit how the first 18 is gonna determine the next few 18's
its sad how life makes u insecure even when i'm he kind tt digs spontaneity

and ehh i cut off ALOT of my brown hair
its back to being short and black
really short
did it a lil in agst
but well i need more than a lil change
in fact i'm really lookin forward to going bald and living a regimental lifestyle(but probably by then i'll hate it..buts tt's always me)

hmm on to slightly lighter stuff
thou i missed some ep of the 7 pm show which stars ella
its damm funny lah
not bad tt a chinese show can manage to get my attention
its soo damm funny
but haa i really cant see guys not being laugh at when u declare ur a gay in a boys school hah
so much so tt the cross dressing part became kinda believeable
still its a show to crack u up and lets u run away from reality for an hour a day

2007-03-08T01:54:00.000+08:00

300
go catch it
caught it on sneak day
its fantastic how the movie managed to capture the essence of the graphic novel so well
probably the BEST adaptation of any graphic novel on the big screen
pawns the likes of v for vendetta,sincity(two superb kickass movies) and the other superhero-y films
the execution is totally superb
thou the book is a lil more stylish..u cld always be a lil unrealistic when drawing stuff
this movie had a lil everything-mysticism,war,gore,stylish spilling of blood,the whole band of warriors theme-so who cares if the plot's a lil thin
everyone knows about the battle of Thermopylae anyway
and i like war films
i always think death brings about the rawest of human emotions
and i need a lil gore-therapy in my life right now anyway
and damm if troy makes u wanna work out.wait till u catch 300
if i had worked out 5hrs a day everyday since the end of the a's i might vaguely look like the spartans in the show
i'm watching it for a second time
i wanna watch it in imax
300-prepare for glory

2007-03-06T00:52:00.000+08:00

i miss the days
when i'm a naive wide eyed boy(ok maybe not so wide)
when i'm giving without wanting to receive
when i'm working for a greater good
when i'm in a team
when i'm not so alone
when i cld smile a real smile and my laughter woud be hearty
when i'm not so cynical
when i'm not so tired of life

i've been talking alot to myself lately(like out loud) so i'm finding myself a lil freaky

i spent the day reading alot of stuff
mostly insignificant stuff
questionable content,wikipedia,and nearly all my entries on the blog
and i realised i missed myself the most

2007-03-05T04:03:00.000+08:00

i guess i cld wallow in self defeat
but i'm too aimless for even that
can someone juz slap me awake?
attempted to try to kinda waste myself on fri...didnt work
ending up doing clean up more than anythng else
i guess manu taught me something
paul scholes certainly did

2007-03-02T02:24:00.000+08:00

Let's dance in style,
let's dance for a while
Heaven can wait we're only watching the skies
Hoping for the best but expecting the worst
Are you gonna drop the bomb or not?

Let us die young or let us live forever
We don't have the power
but we never say never
Sitting in a sandpit,
life is a short trip
Music's for the sad men

Can you imagine when this race is won
Turn our golden faces into the sun
Praising our leaders we're getting in tune
Music's played by the mad men

Forever young,
I want to be forever young
Do you really wanna live forever,
forever, forever?
Forever young,
I want to be forever young
Do you really want to live forever,
forever, forever?

Some are like water,
some are like the heat
Some are a melody,
some are the beat
Sooner or later they all will be gone
Why don't they stay young

It's hard to get old without a cause
I don't want to perish like a fleeing horse
Youth's like diamonds in the sun
And diamonds are forever

So many adventures couldn't happen today
So many songs we forgot to play
So many dreams swinging out of the blue
We let them come true

Forever young,
I want to be forever young
Do you really want to live forever,
forever, forever?
Forever young,
I want to be forever young
Do you really want to live forever,
forever, forever?
Forever young,
I want to be forever young
Do you really want to live forever,
forever, forever?
Forever young,
I want to be forever young
Do you really want to live forever, forever?

2007-03-02T00:11:00.000+08:00

its a sad thing really
i spent a gd 20 mins staring at the screen
i cant put it in words

its not nerves
i'm jus a lil heavy hearted
the rught word would be miserable
not so much for the results
more for having to go back to aj
and having to deal with the sorrow that comes with the regret for having to go back

2007-03-01T01:25:00.000+08:00

i think its time to stop running
firstly there nowhere left
secondly i'm a lil tired
just fuck it and let me handle the life after
i'm tired of not being able to sleep soundly for the past few days
and no matter how i cramp my schedule
it fucking always manages to surface in my mind
i'm just hoping the pain would be short

2007-02-25T03:27:00.000+08:00

i'm not trying to be blasphemous here
but sometimes i wonder
do GOD/gods run on our believe
or do they run our belief
it just so happened that "american gods" sorta put into words my thoughts

and i also do think that nature abhors voids/emptiness
the best example's like i cant frigggin help but feel really disgusted at having an overdose of free time
espicially when u kinda regard off days as rather special
nature abhors voids
like other kind of voids just as well
i know tt just too well

just dont put me in a position to choose when i dont want to

ok the last part's a lil bull
whatever

2007-02-23T00:09:00.000+08:00

so ok new year came and went
for most parts it was nice/fun and stuff
for some parts it was kinda awkward
and the last part's when my body rebelled on me
for feeding it so much junk food

cny's turning a lil routine
but still i get a good laugh looking at the cny pics my family took over the years
and since my ENTIRE family meet up like near every fortnightly
yeah i get the reminder tt i'm the eldest and get every 2-3 weeks
so everyone's real close and i get to play the babysitter often
its fun lookin at ur lil cousins grow/SPRING/SPROUT up and wonder how they view u
maybe its cause i never did noe how its like having a elder cousin/bro
and sometimes being the "guanyu gor gor" is one heck of a stressful task

and because we'r so close when like distant(like my parent's cous) fam comes over
they are like kinda like left out
i think its kinda like my parent's generation way of like showing off what a closly knitted family we are
which is really weird cause awkward things happen during those times
and em i dun see the pt in getting them over
but well i couldnt care less
unless they start snopping around club bush on the third floor(which by the way turned into the single biggest childcare centre on the first day of the new year)

and i think there's something wrong with my system
its failing me way too often
was mashed up sick for three days now
cant smell,cant talk(kinda spells "no work",and i'm hoping i wont need to talk much tml)
i think its the new year goodies,or the excessive alcohol comsumption during the new year
i think its kinda the latter cause come to think of it..eh i realised nearly all the drinks i had since sat night are all alcohol
and the second day of the new year was like spent in the wine vault which was masquerading as my uncle's home.

ok so the nxt part may sound a lil mushy
but what cny does, is remind me how frigging lucky to be on this side of the family
and i do love em alot
thou they are really stressing me up over the a's whick i'm kinda sure i'll screw up and sometimes they do ask me awkward questions which i reply with strange answers

2007-02-14T00:59:00.000+08:00

too many thoughts running thru my head
i think i might as well just shut up
i'm adverse to changes
but at the same time i hate stuff tt's static
i realise sometimes it only takes a smile
but it can also be an expression for the meek
i dream of alot of weird stuff nowadays
i believe that beliefs runs this world
i hate this one particular coin that has two sides
*sighs*
but i dont own it.do i?

for the record i turned down another office job
wth..

2007-02-12T00:58:00.000+08:00

i realised i'm fucking acting at work
bush will probably beat the shit out of working gw if they ever met
working gw's a harmless blur kid that smiles way too much
its easier tt way
the trouble you caused is almost always not your fault
i'm probably waiting for march 16(or somewhere round there)
but right now i'm ok..not make tt enjoying my life as mr workman gw

i reaslise too i'm taking way too long to finish american gods
i ponder too much when i read
or maybe i reading too much into the story

2007-02-09T00:07:00.000+08:00

selling romance.anybody interested?

life's a gem
and i'm not kidding
maybe its life after aj
or maybe its my job
but i'm rather glad i took a job tt allows me to meet different ppl each day
some strangers are pretty distant
while others..u cld almost feel they are kinda made to be your friends
one helped me out today and i'm pretty darn glad
its beautiful how someone can turn your day from a total disaster to a pretty one

and to reiterate.
i'm selling romance.eh pls ask frm me if ur interested
i promise i 'll give a ton of GWPs
go check urban
the bottle's real pretty

2007-02-04T23:58:00.000+08:00

everything's fine and dandy these few days
like way nice sorta nice
not tt i'm complaining
i'm just a lil afraid tt it might just be the calm before a storm

went to the museum on my off day
was rather interesting
some things i realised
are meant to be done alone

and the more i work at my place the more i'm begining to like it
either that or i'm just a really optimistic fella
even then today was a really nice day
the sales were like WOW
made friends with two customers
think i overdid the "to talk cock to them" part..sometimes
hah its not like everyday some guy buys perfume frm you just cause he enjoyed talking to you
i think i talk too much bout my job sometimes
but damm i cant help it
everyday there's a different set of interesting ppl

alright and hah singapore won the asean championship
went to chijmes to catch the match
and wah not bad at all
there were actually quite a decent crowd there catching the game
and most if not all cept one a bloody bugger were all singapore fans
i've seen mad cheering for manu
but wow cheering for the lions cld almost be compared to that
nationalism man
and i made myself a promise to visit as many local tourist/interesting spot
i dont want to be a singaporean who has never been to singapore

manu's just about on now
mr rooney to score another two
tt'll make my day even better

2007-02-02T00:34:00.000+08:00

its the same job
but somehow it feels different
truth to be told i'm just a lil bummed up it cldnt have lasted longer
i'm just glad it happened

2007-01-30T00:11:00.000+08:00

oh i realised sometimes you have to be careful of what you wished for
i sorta openly hoped a job would come and find me
and damm well it rammed straight into me
at least the place's not too bad
but i wont like it if they transferred me elsewhere
but at least i get to see different weird ppl everyday

hmm pretty weird
been reading alot of stuff about decisions and choices
and how they sucked
and how they sometimes dont change anything for the better
read somewhere tt
"in dreams you never do get to make decisons.either tt or there never a decision for you to make at all.you just move as your dream dictates"
aint tt true for life as well

life's is a friggin public good
it takes a bloody hell lotsa effort to exclude the shit parts out
just like decisions i have to make,may it be a hobson's choice or anything else
just like trying to sieve out the fact tt i gotta get my results soon
i'll just put tt lil piece of info somewhere in a dustly corner at the back of my head

2007-01-25T22:53:00.000+08:00

oh damm i landed myself a job without even wanting one
i think its a big mess
i think my mind's a big mess
sometimes life just pushes you along
u arent given a choice at crossroads
now how am i gonna get myself outta this

2007-01-17T22:42:00.000+08:00

hmmm
this is one of the few rare moments i feel bit like trash
i'm like being a bum...but wats wrong with bumming arnd for a while
i hate how i cant wipe tt smile from my face even when its crappy inside
came back and went thru my mail
missed a hell lot
and not the least of those were the meetup with dara
like mutherfuckin i totally cannot believe i'm not there
fuck
fuck
fuck
seen many ppl change over the years
but what just really surprised me is the change in dansen
read a few articles from his blog
and he seemed so politically and socially charged and aware
i'm just drifting in the opposite direction
what happened to the guy tt used to like those stuff?
at least i still had that brain up in my skull
active enough for some good reasoning and sense
unlike some dimwit person i know
pls pratice what you preach
dont be a disgrace for my sake
hmm everyone's getting a job
i'm sorta needing a lot of time and space to sort things out
i need to go on a long walk
kinda like the walk i had in china
walked alone the whole day
in the "ancient city" area
i cld do with some walking here..need a lil air
too bad the weather's bad...
and its hot..i think i cant take sg weather anymore
played a lil tennis with qx tday
the heat was totally unbearable
the sun was nuts
thinking of going to all the museums..
to sugei buloh
botanical grnds to walk a lil
turn my backs on all the hustle and crowds
oh and fuck the rach yamagata's concert cost a bomb..$88
so tt's two years of regrets at the mosiac
i think left at such a wrong time
everything looks so weird here
i see ppl in sch uniforms
guessed i misssed the time when ppl ste things straight
noe wats the problem?
i want to juz keep walking
the fact is tt i need a job
go figure

nothing like good old deathcab to lighten things up
fell in love with this song when i had nothing else but my pod to listen to in china

"I remember when the days were long
and the nights when the living room was on the lawn. Constant quarreling the childish fitsand our clothes in a pile on the ottoman.
All the slander and double speak were only foolish attempts
to show you did not mean,anything
but the blatant proof was your lips touching mine in the photobooth.

And as the summers ending
the cold air rush your hard heart away.
You were so condescending,
and this is all that's left scraping paper to document.
I've packed a change of clothes and it's time to move on.

Cup your mouth to compress the sound,
skinny dipping with the kids from a nearby town.
And everything that I said was true
as the flashes blinded us in the photobooth.
Well I lost track when those words were said,
you took the wheel and you steered us into my bed,
and soon we woke and I walked you home
and it was pretty clear that is was hardly love.

And as the summers ending,
the cold air will rush your hard heart away.
You were so condescending,
and this is all that's left scraping paper to document.
I've packed a change of clothes and it's time to move on.
And as the summers ending,
the cold air will rush your hard heart away.
You were so condescending,
as the alcohol drained the days.
And as the summers ending, the cold air will rush your hard heart away.
You were so condescending.
And this is all that's left,
The empty bottles spent cigarettes so pack a change of clothes
'cause its time to move on."--Photobooth

stuff on shanghai and other places nxt time
i dont think i want to marr tt post with the mood i'm in

2007-01-16T02:00:00.000+08:00

ok
so this is the 2nd and probably the last post from china
oh and i didnt mention the sunrise on the mt
i have got no bloody word for the whole experience
the lil ball of light rising on the horizon
bit by bit
and the ray of light(i mean for real-like RAYS) reflected and refracted thru the ice on the trees
u noe the weird thing is
i half expected to be hit with some profound thoughts
or some new insights
intead my mind was pretty blank
and the only thing running thru my mind was how i cld make this moment last
and a lil regret tt i cldnt share this amlost magical(cliche, i noe) view with anyone else

emm ok
so this trip's one heck of a new experience
in more ways than one
for one, i didnt came on a "tourist-y" sorta trip
i actually lived here
for about a week after the trip up tt mt
got the slightest of idea on how it'll probaly be if i had to go feed to roos
went a lil to the office-blazer,shirt,pants,the works
seen how the plant worked
i totally familarised my self with the workings over here
streets,places,cafes
seen many ppl,got to know a few
they weird thing is i keep seeing recurring faces of someone i knew in sg
ha u have got no idea how totally weird it is

but i have to say i had a pretty gd life
frigging gd food every day
which wasnt a pretty gd reflection of how other chinese lived
given their norm pay
they earn a lil more than sg-dollar for dollar
but the food we ate avg to like 150 per pax
felt tt the income gap here's horrible
i'm not sure bout the policies here but i dun reckon the govt doing much
went to look at the land,houses and cars here too
the weird thing is that they have got no public housing round where my uncle lived
all condos and pvt
given how my uncle's and dad's accociates were toking bout how they are speculating
the rich gets richer like REALLY fast while the poor probably nibble at the sides
its kinda excting here
being here it self i cld really see and feel the city growing,vibes and pulse of the place
SOARING property prices,living std,etc
and tt's even thou my stay's here only like 2weeks
its a totally diff feeling frm sg-now kinda connects when the the person i met on the hk-shenzen trip said tt sg's atmosphere's kinda slack
and u noe what this place's like jointly developed by sg
so its has the looks of a bloody prime area in sg
but of course its no where as clean and the air pollution is still horrible
however i'll still have to say its a place unlike any i've ever seen-it has no big city vibe unlike shanghai,hk but u can totally feel its gonna be a impt place someday
and if every city start to devloped like this place sg do need to try to run a lil ahead

k i'll update bout my lil trip in the shuzhou old city area alone(which was really personal) and the trip to shanghai when i get back to sg

right now i hav a lil less than 12 hours to the flight to shanghai
and hmm i hate to say this but i think i will miss the place
and esp so when i got familiar to the area and i've climatise to the env.
my uncle told me i'll be a lil pissed off at the temp when i go back and i do believe i'll be true
i'm totaly ok with the temp here being 0-6
think i'll hide myself in the air con everyday
and even thou i do miss sg i'll hate to leave this place
alight i'll leave the rest till i get back to sg

2007-01-09T22:53:00.000+08:00

alright ahahha
blogging in china
pretty damm lucky my uncle has a computer here

so the mountain wasnt exactly "vertical limts"
but nevertheless its was damm fun and fucking beautiful yeah
the first day was like totally snow mountain
BEAUUUUTIFUL
the day after when it stopped snowing wass damm nice too
esp when we ventured off the path and walked on some cliff with a sheer drop
OMG
it was DAMMMMM dAMMMM DAMMM beautiful
the view was like "THE VIEW" and there was no annoying china men arnd
and the ice that formed on the trees was like making windchime like sounds and the sound of the stream
ahhh....
i just totally wanted to lie there and not move a muscle
its like the sound my studs on the rocks juz sounded so wrong and artificial there
i so wanted to lie there all by myself
like away from everything
away frm the noisy and rude chinamen
away from the noise tt wernt supposed to be there
away frm all my troubles
away from everythng
and guess what there was clouded leopard on the same friggin mountain
like OMG like a bloody dream come true
too bad i did actually see them...tt wld be like "speechless"
bet its was infinte times better thana day at the botanical gardens,bt timah or sungei buloh
oh my
sungei buloh when i go back is gonna pale so much in comparison

updates again nxt time

2007-01-03T01:41:00.000+08:00

i dont know where to start here
leaving in bout 6 hours time?
to climb some mountain in china...
this is randomness or spontaneity at its peak
i think i just did the ultimate act in spontaneity
i said yes to a trip up some mountains in china and guess wad the trip's like tml
i had a grand total of one day to get myself prepared
i didnt even tell eveyone where i'm gg
wow i like the way i'm starting the new year

2006 one one of the most hellish year i had
i had lil if not none of any sorta gd memories
i totally dies in aj on all fronts
grinded thru every single second of living hell
the only year tt came close to how bad it was was way back in 2001
when someone in the fam died
maybe i changed a lil in the year grew a lil
or did i?
at least the later part of the year was a lil kinder

and seriously like seriously
i am really thankful
for all the company i had to get thru this torrid year
like seriously everyone
lets hope we'r all be there for a long time
those tt kept me gg in aj just by being there a letting me know i had a life outside and effectively preventin me from going nuts
the manu/soccer/bush gang..bug,qx,hy,dtan,lor,ben...taking up tennis at the later prt of the year was nice..now fer lesson?maybe some beach place hols too
and i was seriosuly dreading tt the grp will dissolve after the hols two years ago
ha how two friggin year have past =)

the cat high ppl...andy,hj,wq,chew,hy,jes,justin
hk was prolly the best time i had in the whole year
and the many other time like andy's race,birthdays or the many random time we went out were no less fun
eh and no need to pledge to be better friends lah no needa to be so really formal...
after all arent we effectively family?hahha
and i have to thank andy lah even thou it was juz like the lillest of lil talk he effectively changed some stuff that he might not even know mid way thru my season
em fb and sc also
was nice meetin ur
c told ya the later part of the year was alot ,ore pleasent

and ha mr phang i noe u'll be reading this lah
hey thanks alot also lah
u were prolly the only guy tt i really bothered to let into my life in aj
and ha fer gg to the retest even thou u had no reason to
hola
sry i'm like not on the com or the phone so many thousand times
pool at sicc soon

aiya dunno why i'm like sooo bloody introspective also lah
prolly cause i fell really empty for missing all the stuff before some of the peeps go into army

this years sorta different frm the rest i hope i dont feel lost
maybe the 13 day things for me to sort out my thinking
and like always some resolutions
i'll keep it short: swear less
spend less
get a job
puncutality pls

but seriously i had a blast in the last week of last year and
hoho same old line didnt regret any bit at all
i wont have traded time with those friends or anything in the world
yikes kinda over aint it
ha

i'm sure i missed outta alot i had set out to write but well.....

and oh yeah
p.s.
for those regular visitors and overnight stayers
annual fees have been increased this year
ha pls pay up to ensure u be able to enjoy the amenities for another year

2006-12-30T11:52:00.000+08:00

alright for the second day in a row there's light
i mean like the sun...
been raining since the 24th

and i noe cause it rained right about when the barbecue was supposed to start
hah and aiya damm
this year's like a lil less wild than the last
both 24th AND 25th

but it was still gd thou
and i've got a pretty cool bunch of friends
actually its like cool BUNCHES of friends
thank youuuu

not to mentioned chelsea gave out the biggest boxing day present by dropping two points
HAH glory glory man united

i love the last week of the year
and i think i already had tt out a few post earlier

i love it when u already have something planned out for tomorrow other than plain rotting at home
and aiya somehow my plans are jinxed hah
rained when i wanted to go to sungei buloh and wow its like SUNNY two consecutive days after tht
at least there's like tennis and soccer
i want to get a tan

eh can someone offer me a place to throw my new year's party?

2006-12-23T01:22:00.000+08:00

eh so i'm back
the trip's not so bad after all
if i gotta name it its probably the
"surprise! floods! wallet lost and found trip"
the service there's horrible
some of the ppl too
if genting was gonna do the same job as they did in msia for the sg ir?
ohhh man sg govt probably made the worst ever choice in their life
tt place sucks

oh
i love the last week of the year
EVERYYEAR!
haha
its like i even smile in my sleep
if only singapore didnt have such lousy weather
it'll be much better
i like the huge grps of friends gathering part
haha
christmas- new year here i come!!!!
tralalalalalla

eh can some job...any job come and find me?

2006-12-22T01:00:00.000+08:00

Red Hot Chili Peppers - Snow (Hey Oh)

2006-12-16T21:47:00.000+08:00

alright..
i've realised i've nothing much else to do when i start blogging like this
no moo-lah either
my body clock's screwed up
i sleep at 5 and wake up at 2...the only gd sign's tt i'm still getting 8 hrs daily
i slep thru two days..and i am bored
u'll get to realise u've slept too much when u still cant sleeep after a night at the club

i wanna play tennis soon
or mahjong
or anything else

thought of some really cheap alternative to kill some holiday hrs
-go to the newly opened museum
-trip to sungei buloh
-take some weird walking tour modeled after neil humprehy's journey(lim chu kang and all)
-tennis lessons
-golf lessons
-get a mat ,go to the botanical gnds and read some bk

now all i need is some company
and a really gd book, no luck yet in finding one

and oh...manu has got lille in the champs league
wad luck haha
a season to banish the nightmares of the previous one
too bad i wont be able to catch the final on the 23rd of may
yes
i'm thinking tt far ahead

2006-12-16T19:14:00.000+08:00

It Ends Tonight on VH1

2006-12-10T19:08:00.000+08:00

a lil more on anasi boys..
neli gaiman's way of writting's pretty fresh
introspective, if i were to put it

i'm juz happily holed up
cept tt my hole's three floor's avb ground

newton tt day was a pretty bad mistake
my toliet knows why